My Ex Husband is Marrying My Cousin – and I Was Asked to be A Bridesmaid?!

Wednesday – Reader Question


Hi.  I am not sure what to do about this.  My ex-husband is marrying my cousin.  We were only married for about 6 months when we were young but still! And I am now in a serious relationship with an amazing man so this shouldn’t bother me at all.  But the hurt is obviously still there.  We have a small family and this has definitely put a strain to say the least on my relationship with my cousin. <!–more–>  However, she has asked me to be a bridesmaid.  Really all of the cousins, (there are 5 of us) were asked.  I don’t want my ex to think I care, I don’t want my current boyfriend to think I care. My cousin has always been super competitive with me so I don’t want her to think I care.  But I really do not want to be a part of this wedding.  First of all is it ridiculous I care as we divorced 4 years ago.  And secondly, How can I get out of this without causing some major drama! Help!

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  1. You have every right to say no to this invitation. Why your cousin would even date and marry someone you a were already married to i am speechless and to ask you to be a bridesmaid, she is not thinking of how insensitive this is to you. It may be you feel this way because you have not forgiven your ex or vice versa. For your own sake darlin Repeat to your self:

    ” I forgive and release you ex husband(xxxxxxxx) I forgive and release you cousin(xxxx) and you both forgive and release me now, everything is cleared up between us now, in the past and in the future, I release you both to your happiness and good. ”

    Say this when ever this wedding crosses you mind and you will be ok. You can say no and say it with conviction. you can attend the wedding but you certainly don’t have to be intimately involved with the planning and organizing of it. Feel strong in your decision. good luck!

  2. That could be an awkward moment for both of you. Though you know yourself that you have already moved on, still, out of respect and other considerations, don’t oblige to be the bridesmaid.

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